The 10 Biggest Mistakes in Etiquette Ever and How to Avoid Them

Etiquette, or bon ton, is often seen as a matter of outdated formality, but is actually the foundation of good manners for harmonious social relationships. It’s a true code of polite behavior for living well in society. Many everyday mistakes may seem small, but they leave a negative impression, compromising our image. Let’s discover together the 10 most serious etiquette and bon ton mistakes and how to avoid them to behave at your best.

The 10 Most Serious Etiquette and Bon Ton Mistakes of All Time: What Never to Do

1. Not greeting someone when entering a room

Greeting someone is the first sign of attention and respect for others. Entering any room, whether in a shop, restaurant, office, or someone’s home, without greeting someone conveys a sense of arrogance or disinterest.

• What to do: Always say “Good morning” or “Good evening” with a smile. If you’re in a more formal setting, accompany your greeting with a handshake or at least a nod.
• Additional tip: Even in virtual contexts like video calls, it’s important to always greet those present, both when entering and when ending the call.

2. Using your smartphone at the table

Using your phone at the table is one of the most common and least tolerated breaches of etiquette. Being distracted by your smartphone is a sign of disinterest in those around you.

• What to do: Before sitting down to eat, silence your phone and keep it out of sight. If you’re expecting an urgent call, let those present know in advance and go outside to talk at the appropriate time.
• Style tip: Carry a clutch or small bag to store your phone to avoid the temptation to use it.

3. Interrupting the speaker

Interrupting is synonymous with rudeness and is often perceived as a form of egocentricity. It shows that you’re not truly interested in what the other person is saying.

• What to do: Listen attentively and wait for a natural pause to intervene. If you need to say something urgently, ask permission with a phrase like, “Can I add something?”
• Practice active listening: Look the speaker in the eye, nod, and avoid thinking about your response while the other person is still speaking.

4. Not respecting the dress code

Dressing inappropriately for an occasion can make you appear out of place and disrespectful to the event organizers.

• What to do: Read the invitation carefully or ask the organizers for clarification if the dress code is unclear. Dressy, casual, or formal attire should be chosen carefully.
• Pro tip: When in doubt, opt for elegance. It’s always better to be a little more formal than too casual.

5. Speaking too loudly

Raising your voice in public is annoying and can attract unwanted attention, making those around you uncomfortable. There’s nothing worse than someone who monopolizes attention with loud, garish tones.

• What to do: Be aware of the context. In quiet or formal environments, speak softly and modulate your voice based on background noise.
• Practical tip: If you tend to speak too loudly, try recording yourself and listening to your tone. With time and a little practice, you’ll learn to regulate it.

6. Ignoring table etiquette

Chewing noisily, speaking with your mouth full, or using cutlery incorrectly are mistakes that can ruin a meal.

• What to do: Keep your elbows off the table, use cutlery in the order in which they are laid out, and sip your drinks quietly.
• Practice at home: Host a formal dinner with friends or family to practice good manners.

7. Not responding to an invitation

Not confirming or declining an invitation is a sign of disrespect for those who have dedicated time to organizing an event.

• What to do: Always respond, preferably within 24 hours of receiving the invitation. Even if you can’t attend, thank them and explain the reason for your absence.
• Digital etiquette: If you receive an invitation via email or text message, make sure your response is courteous and free of grammatical errors.

8. Arriving late without warning

Punctuality is a fundamental value and the first sign of rudeness towards others. Making others wait without prior notice demonstrates a lack of respect for their time.

• What to do: If you anticipate an unexpected delay, inform them as soon as possible and try not to be more than 15 minutes late.
• Organize yourself better: Plan your route with a safety margin for any unforeseen circumstances. The best thing to do is to always arrive at least 5 minutes early for any type of appointment.

10. Don’t say thank you or apologize

Simple words like “thank you” and “sorry” are essential for maintaining honest, healthy, and respectful relationships. Ignoring them is a grave mistake and can lead to the loss, even the end, of important relationships that we may even have cherished.

• What to do: Thank someone every time they do something for you, from the smallest gesture to the most significant. If you make a mistake, apologize sincerely without overly justifying yourself. Admitting a mistake never killed anyone; perfection doesn’t exist, and if it did, humans certainly don’t have it.
• An extra gesture: In formal settings, a handwritten thank-you note is a touch of class that never goes unnoticed.

As you’ve seen, making mistakes in etiquette is quite easy, but you’ve also learned that etiquette isn’t synonymous with extreme rigidity, but rather with respect for yourself and others. Avoiding these 10 mistakes can improve others’ perception of you and the quality of your relationships, both personal and professional. Start with small steps and you’ll see how savoir faire will become part of your everyday life.